A Sad Anniversary

It was 2 years ago yesterday when my life, and the lives of so many other people, were changed forever. That was the day that my brother-in-law Mark, Craig and Brian's brother, died. I normally try to keep these posts funny and upbeat but that is a day that will always be tinged with sadness. Plus this is my blog so I can do whatever I want with it. : )

Mark was one of the nicest, funniest, and most caring people I'd ever met. His death definitely made the world a less bright of a place. I struggled a lot after Mark died since I considered him to be my brother, not an in-law. I've gradually come to a place where I can appreciate everything he was, like being a great son, brother, and friend. I also can remember the things that made me laugh: his unique sense of humor; his mental acuity at scoring a dart game (or telling you what you needed to hit to win); how many cigarettes he could smoke in a day (he probably would've put Joe Camel to shame) and his ensuing smoker's cough; his fondness for coffee; how he could fall asleep with a drink in his hand and not spill a drop; and how whenever we heard "Friends in Low Places" by Garth Brooks he and I would dance together no matter where we were. : )

In short, although his time with us was way too brief, I wouldn't trade the years I had with him for anything. If I would've known 10 years ago that I/we would be suffering like this, I still wouldn't change anything, since knowing him was worth every laugh and tear. I've learned so much from Mark and I truly believe that these life lessons were the greatest gift he could've given us besides his love (and I know that he did love all of us). It comforts me to think that when it's my time to leave this Earth, one of the first faces I'll see will be his. Until then, I'm comforted in knowing who my guardian angel is. Below is a poem (author not listed) that I found that I can envision Mark saying to all of us. I hope that it brings comfort to anyone who needs it.

I love you Mark.

When I am gone, release me, let me go;
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears,
be happy that we had so many years.

I gave you my love, you can only guess,
how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown,
but now it's time I traveled on alone.

So grieve awhile for me, if grieve you must.
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part,
so bless the memories within your heart.

I won't be far away, for life goes on.
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me I'll be near,
and if you listen with your heart, you'll hear
all of my love around you, soft and clear.

And then, when you must come this way alone,
I'll greet you with a smile and say "Welcome Home."